I fucking hate vodka.
My junior year of high school I swore off that shit after an unfortunate incident in the parking lot of an under 21 club. But I fucking love bacon. As Jim Gaffigan once pointed out, bacon is so good, to improve other food they wrap it in bacon. So what am I supposed to do when bacon flavored vodka (http://bakonvodka.com/) hits the market? On the one hand, vodka’s only ever made me puke, piss myself, and alienate friends, and I made a promise to myself that I would never associate with it again. On the other hand, whiskey’s done all that and more (read: hook up with swamp donkeys), and I’m always quick to forgive it. Plus, how was I supposed to know that by swearing off vodka I’d be swearing off BACON FLAVORED BOOZE? I think I’m going to treat this situation the same way I approach a questionable food–wait for phatphucker’s opinion. Considering the fact that I’ve seen him drink a mixture of Jagermeister, OJ, and Peppermint Schnapps without so much as cringing, I think I know how this will turn out.
And no, I’m not nearly as tempted by the smoked salmon flavored vodka
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