Now THIS is how you sell clothing…

www.theproperlounge.com

I used to sell T-shirts outside of Wrigley Field. It was fun. I still do some work for the company and if you want to check out some of our shirts, you can click on the CrosstownTees link. Or even better, just go to CrosstownTees.com

We weren’t the only crew outside Wrigley and we developed relationships (both good and bad) with some of our rivals out there. One such rival was a 48-year-old man named Joe Sienkiewicz, better known as simply “Cry.”

He was called Cry because he used to sell shirts outside of U.S. Cellular Field as well that said Cubs are crybabies. And he said it in a very high pitched voice.

This is Cry now:

This is Cry just hours before heading out to Studio 54 in Manhattan in 1977:

Clearly he’s come a long way.

Nowadays, Cry still sells outside of Wrigley Field and probably does a bunch of other cool stuff too (like wearing hats or creeping out children). Lately though, he got bit by the political bug. At first he debated running for mayor of Chicago, but they don’t allow escaped fugitives to file the necessary paperwork. So he jumped to the next logical resource: hilarious political t-shirts!

Cry leans a little to the right…so much so that he associates President Barack Obama with the end of the world. A logical standpoint without any possible retorts. It’s something that everyone agrees with! Obama’s reckless spending will lead to Armageddon! Or, more accurately:

OBAMAGEDDON!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Whether you agree with this assessment or not is irrelevant (and possibly qualifies as socialism), but the important thing is the marketing plan. First, Cryingham J. Cryington created the immensely popular website to sell the shirt www.obamageddon.biz (it’s .biz because Cry means bizness, yo). Professional enough sure, but Cry also decided to take it to the next level.

By shooting a video…

Where he describes what’s on the shirt…

In a manly voice…

With a bird in the background…

Now ignoring the fact that he doesn’t use the Oxford Comma, this is a pretty impressive video. Without it, I couldn’t possibly determine if this shirt was worth my money. But now I know it is the greatest “Obamageddon T-shirt Out.” Also, I’m totally allowed to “stop in” to his website (like in Tron?) and purchase as many as I like. So that’s a pretty big coup.

But I wasn’t really sold until Cry told me what the shirt comes complete with:

1.) Volcano
2.) Congress Building (normally called the Capitol Building, but what the hell, this isn’t social studies test) exploding on top “just spitting out money.”

I’ll take 30!

—–

posted by: Proper, IL