The President’s Cup Trophy winning Washington Capitals are going to be remembered this season, but not for winning the Stanley Cup. The 2010 Caps became the first 1 seed ousted in the first round after holding a 3-1 series lead over an 8 seed.
In a tearful post-game interview, defenseman Mike Green blamed a caveman.
“I lied about the GEICO caveman crashing the Zamboni into the boards at Verizon Center. First of all, the Zamboni was NOT calibrated correctly. I saw Russ the mechanic drinking beer and playing cricket while he was supposed to be working on equipment during practices all the time. Russ has worked with the Capitals organization since 1974. C’mon ice is slippery, but not that slippery…the GEICO caveman knew how to drive that thing. I knew he didn’t mean to scratch that logo along the boards, who knows when that Zamboni was last properly serviced.”
Green bemoaned selling out the GEICO spokesman to protect the long-time mechanic in a recent commercial for the Insurance Company. His performance in the 7 game series against the Canadiens was less than admirable. Green was a +1 with 3 assists and 12 penalty minutes in the series. He was sent to the sin bin after cross checking Montreal defenceman Andrei Markov with 41.2 seconds left in the first period of Wednesday’s game which led to a 4 on 3 go ahead power play goal by Habs’ Marc-Andre Bergeron.
Apparently, the devout Caps’ fan did not like being sold-out by members of his favorite team.
It is rumoured that the GEICO caveman used his contacts at the Verizon Center to make life tough for the home team. The caveman allegedly had a “relative” unplug the stadium freezers (which keep game pucks at a cool 20 degrees Fahrenheit), possibly inhibiting superstar Alex Ovechkin from settling pucks down to shoot during several 1-on-1 rushes against Montreal defenders, who blocked or deflected over 30 shots during the course of a do-or-die game 7.
League officials are investigating the caveman’s ties to members of staff in Toronto’s video review booth after a Washington goal was waved off late in the game.
“Its a shame, really.” continued Green. ”You work so hard for something just to see it end very abruptly.”
When reached for comment about the game 7 stunner, the GEICO caveman seemed carefree about the loss.
“My wife just paged me. The cat just threw up on our rug. I don’t really have time to talk about the game right now.”
It looked like finishing off the Canadiens after having them in a 3-1 hole would be so easy, even a caveman could do it. Sometimes now we know, that just isn’t the case.
Green_put the helmet back on.