In his new book “The Grand Design”, quadriplegic and smartest-man-on-the-planet Stephen Hawking asserts that God didn’t create the universe.
“Spontaneous creation is the reason why there is something rather than nothing, why the universe exists, why we exist,” he writes. It is not necessary to invoke God to light the blue touch paper [fuse] and set the universe going.”
He then goes into a bunch of mumbo-jumbo about particles and blobs and dimensions.
It makes me wonder about Stephen Hawking’s plight. His life has revolved around his brilliance and the entire human race has benefitted from his hard work. What has he gotten out of the deal? A wheelchair, an electronic voice and the haunting knowledge that if aliens come to Earth, they will destroy us all, take our natural resources, and move on to the next planet. Stephen Hawking deserves better. Fuck that.
It appears Antti Niemi will be taking a page out of a Louis L’Amour novel. The local hero heads West after being wronged in his own town. He joined up with a Sharks posse which he helped to embarrass in their last meeting. The Niemi plot just got thicker. Was he wronged? Can he prove himself? Will he get revenge? How will it end?
According to a new paper in the journal Alcoholism: Clinical and Experimental Research, People that fall under the category of “heavy drinker” (classified as 4 or more drinks per day) live longer than people who abstain from alcohol altogether*. Those who are “moderate drinkers” (1 to 3 drinks per day) are said to live the longest. And, no stupid, that doesn’t mean if you only go out on Saturday and have 20 beers you fall in the moderate category.
*Clearly this study was fucked up, probably because someone involved has a severe alcohol problem, and can’t possibly be taken seriously.
imgross has gone international. With views from Brazil to Bangkok, from Canada to Cambodia, imgross has a reach that is undeniable. Here is a list of 7 different ways to say imgross.org
7.) jeg er brutto.org Norwegian 6.) Ik ben het bruto.org Dutch 5.) Sono lordo.org Italian 4.) Я валового.org Russian 3.) Jag är brutto.org Swedish 2.) I be gross.org Ebonics 1.) 난 심한 오전.org Korean
The best way for ideas to spread is through word of mouth. So, the next time you are in Sweden, spread news about Jag är brutto.org.
Nyjer Morgan proved just how gangsta he is on Wednesday night when he took a run at 6′8″ pitcher Chris Volstad. The 6′ 175 Lbs Morgan (or so he is officially listed at) decided to throw down with the Marlins pitcher after he hit him once and then threw behind him in the next at bat. Volstad probably was upset that Morgan decided to steal second and third in an eleven run game after being hit the first time. The inciting incident took place on Tuesday when Nyjer dislocated the shoulder of Marlins rookie catcher Brett Hayes on a collision at the plate. Morgan is a scrappy little guy, perhaps this is trait he acquired while playing Major Junior ice hockey for the WHL’s Regina Pats. Love him or hate him “Tony Plush” (Morgan’s self-given “Gentleman’s name”) is a guy I would like to have in my foxhole.
Few professional athletes bother me as much as Mark Teixeira. He’s a pretty good ballplayer and probably a nice guy. That still doesn’t stop me from thinking he is a penis.
Mark (Teh-Shar-Uh) reminds me of a combination of athletes I have played with over the course of my athletic career. He seems like the type of guy who is probably legitimate friends with the coach. Nobody else really likes him because he picks his nose in public far too often and is periodically caught eating his boogers. Look at those nostrils. Widened from years having his finger up his nose digging for gold. He probably was the kind of kid who told people to be quiet on the bus when his high-school team went to away games.
Athletes normally fit into a box other athletes can understand. ”Hard-working”, “naturally gifted”, and “very smart player” are some that everyone should be able to identify with (see Dennis Rodman, Marcus Robinson and Greg Maddux). There are also “freak athletes” like LeBron James, Michael Phelps, and Shaq whose bodies are just built different than they should be (see Jevon Kearse).
Mark Teixeira probably was hated by his peers at every level of sports. Everyone who has played sports had one guy like Teixeira on his team at some point. A guy with pretty good genes and muscle tone who could hit a baseball 600 feet but for some reason looked awkward throwing a football. Yet he was good at darts. It never makes sense. How can a guy this good at one thing not be good at other things that require similar skill sets? Teixeira is the guy with the August birthday that plays against people mostly a full year younger than him. A switch hitter because he just happens to be ambidextrous.
The Teixeiras of the world are the guys who don’t wash their gym clothes for a long time, but aren’t the meatheads who think its cool to do so and brag about it. He’s the type of guy who doesn’t use enough deodorant. The type of teammate who finishes first when having to do a fence lap because someone else screwed up. Then the rest of the team has to look at him squirt water into his stupid face with something unimportant to say like, “Nice goin’ guys”.
I hate Mark Teixeira and I don’t even know him. I just hate what he reminds me of.
