Gary Coleman, 42
Nick Notle, 69
A special thanks to these two individuals for truly being beacons of gross. Happy Birthday gentlemen.
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Posted in webmaster phelps.
By admin
– February 8, 2010
dubai, united arab emirates– the 2,717 foot burj dubai (the worlds tallest man-made structure ever built) was unexpectedly closed for public use this past sunday for unknown reasons. the closing comes at the worst possible time for a sheikdom attempting to increase its tourism revenue to help repay over 20 billion in international debt. the persian gulf city-state has predictably been extremely secretive about the need to shut down public use of the 1.5 billion dollar (approx. 4 billion dirham) leviathan. looks like dubai will once more be plunged into a hole of embarrassment and serious debt. this looks like the biggest planning blunder since Disney World Southern Rhodesia. i can hear “Bassbor Al Fourgakom” being played on the worlds smallest violin right now
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Posted in alec.
By admin
– February 8, 2010
Reggie Bush celebrated the pinnacle of his professional career and possibly the pinnacle of his life by bringing his girlfriend Kim Kardashian down onto the field and then onto the stage with him.
Come on Reggie, you celebrate with your teammates on the field and then after a long night of partying with alcohol, drugs and strippers, you can go home and celebrate* with Ray J’s slampiece, that’s just being a man 101. There is a strict criteria for bringing a woman onto the field…she must be 1.) the mother of your children 2.) must be married for over 20 years 3.) the woman must be some sort of terminal illness survivor. If the woman does not fit this criterion, leave her in the stands.
*Ravage her body over and over and over again.
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Posted in Senator Robert Byrd.
By admin
– February 8, 2010
Tony Dungy told William C. Rhoden of the New York Times that not only will the Colts win … but the game won’t even be close!
Well fuck you Tony Dungy!…What happened to “Quiet Strength?”
Shut your mouth and go help some inner city youths or something. The world is getting sick of your bullshit.
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Posted in Senator Robert Byrd.
By admin
– February 8, 2010
Getting your boner rubbed on by a stripper is obviously awesome, but wouldn’t it be even sweeter if you could get lap dances from the women you encounter in your everyday life?
You know, like the hot 20 year old that works the drive thru window at Wendy’s, the skanky bank teller at your bank, your buddy’s sister, some chick you see on the El………..whatever???
I think the process should operate exactly as it does at the strip club:
-Make the initial eye contact (because just like strippers…if I ain’t lookin’ at ya, don’t come over).
-Make some small bullshit chit chat
-Then just say “How about I trade you $30 for roughly 2-3 minutes of you grinding your shit on my boner while you’re completely naked?”……..”Okay, okay you can wear a g-string, but at least pull it to the side once during the dance so I can see the goods.”
-Then the girl takes you by the hand to a semi-private, semi-dark, near by seated area and does the deed.
-She tells you you’re good looking and that you have a “nice build,” you pay her and everyone goes on their marry way.
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Posted in brohan.
By admin
– February 8, 2010
Hey Tokyo, is it really necessary to have a combination sink and toilet? You cant have both? Your space is that valuable?You need to fucking cool it.
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Posted in webmaster phelps.
By admin
– February 8, 2010
We at the imgross offices love us some curb your enthusiasm. So…I’m obliged to pay homage to the final episode that includes the seinfeld sub plot of George’s iPhone app “iToilet”. I’ve just discovered a hell of a place to make #2. Bed bath and beyond. I’ve been sitting in here for 15 minutes and not a single man has come in. So take your woman and make them happy by letting them browse “triple B”, just make sure u eat your burrito the night before.
I wrote this on the toilet.
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Posted in adam.
By admin
– February 8, 2010
Leif, from Aurora, Colorado, is winner of imgross apparel red pocket t shirt. He correctly guessed 22. He gets to take home this gorgeous red pocket t shirt, a perfect addition to any wardrobe. Good work sir.
The next imgross apparel t shirt giveaway will be announced this week. Stay tuned.
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Posted in admin.
By admin
– February 7, 2010
On Thursday the dow sunk 268 points to its lowest close in three months. When asked for comment, Stuart Mackenzie reaffirmed his belief that a secret meeting of the all powerful “Pentaverate” was the cause.
“We all know that the queen, the vatican, the gettes, the rothschilds, and that damn colonel sanders is to blame. Is anyone listening to me? I’ve been preaching this for 16 years!”
The Pentaverate was unreachable for comment.
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Posted in adam.
By admin
– February 5, 2010
ABC News is reporting that in 1988, woman became pregnant after performing oral sex and then being stabbed in the abdomen. My first reaction was “bullshit” but it turns out that the girl had no vagina due to a birth defect called Mullerian agenesis. Let this be a lesson to all our young people out there that if you are going to engage in oral sex, don’t be in a situation where you can be brutally stabbed soon after. It’s best to practice safe sex and always pull out. ABCNews story
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Posted in scott.
By admin
– February 5, 2010
